Dear Angela Merkel,


Dear Angela Merkel,

I kinda liked you. You were from the East, a single woman, an underdog in German politics. You were an outsider.

Then you had a little trouble with some Turks. Apparently there were a few German citizens that did a little terrorizing in Pakistan.

And now, suddenly, you’ve decided that after only 20 years of racial integration, it’s not working and it’s all the immigrants’ fault.

So my conclusion is that you’re a douche.

What’s that? The Turks don’t speak English? Could that be perhaps because there hasn’t been an effort to provide German as a Second Language programs that would teach them to speak German? Could it perhaps be because you allow people to enter the country under the assumption (or if I were more cynical, hope) that they will leave soon?

Turkish people come to Canada and they have no problem integrating. The problem is not the Turks, the problem is that Germany is still full of old Nazis. As a German-Canadian, this is hard for me to say. But it’s the truth. You may feel forever guilty about all the racist crap you did in the ’40s, but you clearly haven’t learned from it.

You’re a douche, Angela Merkel. A real douche.


Comments 5

  1. jason wrote:

    She’s not even the _good_ kind of douche that can get rid of that not-so-fresh feeling, either.

    Posted 23 Oct 2010 at 3:54 pm
  2. jason wrote:

    …and I guess underscores before and after don’t make things italic. Let me try some HTML code.

    Posted 23 Oct 2010 at 3:54 pm
  3. jason wrote:

    Oooooh, that totally works. So, to recap:

    Merkel, bad douche.

    Summer’s Eve (tee-hee), good douche.

    Posted 23 Oct 2010 at 3:55 pm
  4. Eve wrote:

    Actually, just to clarify, vaginal douches are horribly bad for vaginal health:

    Douching can change the delicate balance of vaginal flora (organisms that live in the vagina) and acidity in a healthy vagina. One way to look at it is in a healthy vagina there are both good and bad bacteria. The balance of the good and bad bacteria help maintain an acidic environment. Any changes can cause an over growth of bad bacteria which can lead to a yeast infection or bacterial vaginosis. Plus, if you have a vaginal infection, douching can push the bacteria causing the infection up into the uterus, fallopian tubes, and ovaries.

    Summer’s Eve is especially bad for you, because they do things like this:

    Posted 23 Oct 2010 at 5:53 pm
  5. Eve wrote:

    Also, your last post was at 3:55pm, and my last post was at 5:53pm. So that’s awesome.

    Posted 23 Oct 2010 at 5:54 pm