Dear Angela Merkel,

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Dear Angela Merkel,

I kinda liked you. You were from the East, a single woman, an underdog in German politics. You were an outsider.

Then you had a little trouble with some Turks. Apparently there were a few German citizens that did a little terrorizing in Pakistan.

And now, suddenly, you’ve decided that after only 20 years of racial integration, it’s not working and it’s all the immigrants’ fault.

So my conclusion is that you’re a douche.

What’s that? The Turks don’t speak English? Could that be perhaps because there hasn’t been an effort to provide German as a Second Language programs that would teach them to speak German? Could it perhaps be because you allow people to enter the country under the assumption (or if I were more cynical, hope) that they will leave soon?

Turkish people come to Canada and they have no problem integrating. The problem is not the Turks, the problem is that Germany is still full of old Nazis. As a German-Canadian, this is hard for me to say. But it’s the truth. You may feel forever guilty about all the racist crap you did in the ’40s, but you clearly haven’t learned from it.

You’re a douche, Angela Merkel. A real douche.

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